Avoid These Common Baby Sleep Mistakes

The reason your baby isn’t sleeping well could be because you're (unknowingly) falling into one or two of these sleep pitfalls.

We all do our very best and try everything to get our little ones to sleep but if every tip from Google still leaves you in the same place, then take a look below at some of the most common baby sleep mistakes (full disclosure - I did ALL of these with my own children prior to becoming a sleep coach) along with some additional tips for what to do instead.

#1: Sleeping in silence

Babies like noise - not the occasional shout from a sibling or dog barking next door, but low, rumbly white noise which is the closest replica to the constant soothing sounds heard in the womb. The familiar shower-like sound of white noise helps activate your baby's calming reflex an in turn prepare for sleep. This is why shushing is also such a vital tool as well.

There's no right or wrong as to when you need to transition them away from white noise - my 6 year old still finds it very comforting at night so we still use it!

#2: Dressing baby inappropriately for sleep

Babies are more sensitive to temperature than adults and can’t regulate their body temperature as well. If they're too hot or too cold, they may wake frequently, seem unsettled, or even resist going to sleep in the first place.

Instead:

• Dress your baby according to the room temperature, not the season and always check against handy charts like this from SlumberSac.

• Cool hands and feet aren’t always a reliable indicator - feel their chest or back to gauge their core temperature.

• If you think your toddler hates a sleeping bag, don't jump the gun and move straight to a duvet - before the age of 3 years, the concept of pulling up the duvet in the night can be a difficult one. Instead, try a sleeping bag with feet which can be a great alternative and you can always add socks for a little more coziness!

#3: Inconsistent bedtime routines

When bedtime is rushed, skipped, or varies in order and length, it can lead to confusion and resistance. Your child might become overstimulated and unsure of what’s expected which can sometimes lead to harder bedtimes.

Instead, little ones thrive on predictability. A consistent bedtime routine will help your baby or toddler feel safe, calm and ready for sleep. As your infant gets better at remembering patterns, all these sleepy time cues signal that sleep is near.

Keep bedtime roughly the same time each night with the same steps in the same order. It doesn't need to be complicated or long:

• Dim the lights 30 to 60 minutes before sleep time

• Turn on the white noise

• Read a story

• Feed

• Sing a song and settle to sleep.

#4: Rushing in too quickly

Babies spend up to half of their sleep time in REM sleep, which is marked by lots of eye-fluttering, wiggles, squirms, and vocal outbursts. Rushing in too soon when they're making noises can actually stop them doing the very thing that we need them to practice!

Yes, we have an inbuilt urge to resolve any crying in our little ones asap but if these are just grumbles, then from 4 months, allow your little one the time and space to venture through their sleep cycles on their own.

Instead of rushing:

• Pause - when they wake, take a moment before rushing over. Listen to them and think about what they may be trying to communicate.

• Give them space - if they’re just grumbling, let them be. It’s a perfect time to practice the potential that they may just nod back off.

• Support - if they don’t, and they clearly need your support, then of course - help them back to sleep.

We will always support them in the most appropriate way back to sleep, but as with anything, practice makes perfect, so if there are opportunities a few times a week where they don’t need you straight away, let them get that practice in!

#5: Napping too long/at the wrong times of day

Naps are essential for babies and toddlers, but when and how long your little one naps for can have a big impact on their overnight sleep. One of the most common pitfalls I see is letting a child nap for too long, or too late in the day, or at irregular times, without realising how much it can throw off bedtime and night sleep.

I get it - if a little one is tired and sleeps for a certain length in the day - surely they need it right?! I've come across many children that enjoy their day sleep to the detriment of night so if nights are tricky, then it could be time to revisit day sleep and make some tweaks.

Instead:

• Get an idea of how much sleep in a 24hr period suits your child

• Stick to a wake window that suits them (this may be much longer than you realise!)

• Cap naps if you need

• It can be preferable to avoid sleeping past 4.30pm

👉 Find my sleep needs chart here.

#6: Delaying bedtime so baby sleeps in

Ignoring your child’s natural rhythms in the hopes of a later start to your day isn't fool proof.

Babies (and adults!) are guided by their circadian rhythm - our inbuilt biological clock that helps regulate when we wake and sleep. This rhythm is strongly influenced by light, hormones, and routine. When we push bedtime too late, it can disrupt the rhythm and make sleep more fragmented.

Instead:

• Combine age-appropriate wake windows to guide bedtime PLUS....

• Watch your little one's behaviour closely in the evening to find the time that suits them best

• Keep bedtime within a 30min window each night even if your baby wakes early (this helps reset their internal clock over time)

• In general, bedtime tends to sit nicely between 6.30pm-8pm for most little ones over 6months.
  

👉 If early rising is a problem, download my Early Rising guide for all the strategies!

#7: Changing the settling techniques

This is the 'try everything' approach.

• One night you’re patting to sleep, the next you’re feeding to sleep

• You try “drowsy but awake” for a few minutes, then switch to rocking

  
  

When one thing doesn't work, we switch to another, then try something else until there's a just a whole bunch of settling techniques that seemingly don't work and everyone is rather cranky and upset.

We know that babies and toddlers feel safest and most secure when they know what to expect. If you’re trying a new settling method each night, they don’t get a chance to learn the new skill - they’re just constantly adjusting to a new one.

Instead:

• Choose a settling approach that fits your parenting style and your baby’s temperament

• Streamline the support you offer - make it really simple, calm and predictable so your little one feels supported

• Make sure the support isn't a world away from where you started - too big a jump and they will struggle. Just take the next gradual step

• Stick with it for at least 3 days to allow time for your child to adjust

  
  

#8: Inconsistent morning wake time

Starting the day at 6am one day, 8am the next is not going to support your little one's circadian rhythm.  This morning anchor sets the tone for the whole day: naps, feeds, bedtime, and even overnight sleep.

It is SO important to get this one right. When wake up time varies from day to day, it throws the body clock and so babies can start to resist naps, struggle to fall asleep at night, or wake up more frequently overnight - not because of a big developmental leap or habit - but simply because their body clock is confused.

Instead:

• Set a consistent morning wake time (for 6 months + anytime between 6-7am works best)

• Stick to it even after a rough night and wake your child if you need

• Open the blinds and let that natural daylight in as soon as they wake

I hope those common sleep pitfalls have been helpful and given you some ideas as to what you may need to focus on to improve sleep.

If it gets too overwhelming and you would love more help, I'm here to guide you through what actually works for your baby to get sleep settled through a bespoke plan and 1:1 support.

👉 Book a call to find out how I work